I hate this time of year. The time when everyone wants change, but it just won’t come fast enough? Yeah, we’re ready for a break at school, ready for the snow and mud to disappear and green grass and plants to take its place, ready for warm weather and a new wardrobe of clothes. I’m terrible at waiting–I have patience until the cows come home with small children, but I am hardly patient when it comes to change. I want it done with already.
I’m also tired of doom and gloom. I want change here too, and I’m hoping it will come with the rebirth of life associated with spring. Again this week, my poor friends. One lost a baby at 37 weeks–I can’t even comment on this one. Too close to home. Another found out her youngest brother has cancer, again. And yet another was to be married in August, only to have her fiance break it off, no warning. We’re not talking about little things–they’re huge, life-altering situations. None of this is happening to me, but I can’t help but empathize with these people. I feel an overwhelming predisposition to sadness these days, it seems everytime I turn around, the prescription for folks is more trying times and dreams flushed down the toilet. When is it going to end?
I’m beginning to think that maybe I’ve really lived a sheltered life. This past year has really opened my eyes to the hard times and strife that exist in the world. I don’t know if it’s just because I’m getting older and naturally, people get sicker, or is it that I care too much about others and get wrapped up in their lives, or is it that I’ve had my head so far up my ass with my own woes that I’ve just blocked out all of these things going on around me?
I’m ready to blog about happier times. I’m tired of having nothing to talk about but my own hopelessness with how life is panning out for myself and my friends. I’m hoping in my case and those of my friends that times are about to change, that we are going to turn a corner and finally see some things go our way. Maybe work will stabilize, maybe kids will be in our future, maybe we will be able to sell our house and finally begin to really think about building a new one. The one inch plants poking out of my woodchips and buds on my bushes give me the faintest hope that life can spring anew and things can look again to the bright side. If only I could get there faster.
Keep your spirits up! It will all turn around eventually
*hugs*